Christchurch is a city in shock after Mayor Sideshow Bob announces that he will be seeking a third term in office.

Christchurch is reeling at the news that Mayor Sideshow Bob will be seeking a third term as mayor of the quake-devastated city.

'What would Tony (Marryatt) do without me?' said Parker. 'Who would he have his secret meetings with? He might get asked to pay back that $34,000 worth of back pay he promised to return. Remember - a vote for me and good local government means voting twice.'

Traci Wilson of Aranui  said she was 'appalled' that Sideshow was standing for re-election.

'We've had earthquakes, Gerry Brownlee and CERA - and now this. How much longer does Christchurch have to suffer?'

Ms Wilson is still waiting for her quake damaged home to be repaired.

Dave 'Hendo'  Henderson, a former property developer  who was placed  in bankruptcy in  2010, said he was 'delighted' that his good friend was standing for re-election.

'Christchurch deserves  more of Bob like I deserve a good dose of the clap. And I could do with a few more million  to get me back in the property game. I know that Councillor Sue Wells would vouch for me - like she did last time.'

Civil Defence  said they were aware  of Sideshow Bob's mayoral ambitions and were monitoring the situation closely.

'The situation is  not  unrecoverable.'   a spokesman said last night. 'The solution lies in the hands of the good people of Christchurch - vote the clown and all his flunkies out of office.'


  1. Traci of Aranui can go whistle for her quake repairs, because Bob has discovered that we DON"T NEED MUNTERS! "Christchurch used to have slaughterhouses - now meat comes from the internet. When we're old and incontinent ROBOTS will do the nasty stuff. If you people must live, do it in Invercargill or somewhere."


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