Christchurch is a 'vibrant ' and 'exciting' place to be, declares Sideshow Bob, who isn't living in a garage..
Above is the latest piece of spin from Canterbury Tourism - the same people who brought you the wacky adventures of Sideshow Bob searching for a big pineapple, a truly awe-inspiring piece of filmmaking
The Ever Evolving City tells us 'there's no time for cloudy skies' in Christchurch. There's not a damaged house in sight. Look hard for impoverished and struggling people living in garages and substandard housing - you won't find any. In fact Canterbury Tourism didn't quite manage to make it out to the eastern suburbs.
Instead you can listen to Sideshow Bob boasting that, according to the Lonely Planet tourist guide, Christchurch is one of the world's top places to visit.
According to Bob, who is on more than $200,000 a year, isn't living in substandard housing and isn't engaged in hand to hand combat with the Earthquake Commission and the insurance companies, Christchurch is a 'vibrant' and 'exciting' place to be.
'The rebuild is ramping up!', declares Sideshow, which will be surprising news indeed to people in the eastern suburbs. And didn't he say exactly the same thing last year?
Back in reality, Canterbury District Health Board (CDHB) member Andrew Dickerson says he is concerned abut the 'growing sense of despair' in some areas of Christchurch.
He told The Press: that 'damaged, damp and overcrowded homes meant communicable diseases like influenza, whooping cough and measles could flourish this winter, putting added strain on a health system already under pressure.'
"The conditions some people are now living in I never expected to see in New Zealand," Dickerson said, who clearly doesn't realise that there is 'no time for cloudy skies' in Christchurch.
And social services are also warning that the third winter since the big quake is likely be most severe yet and are bracing themselves for 'what's coming through the door'.
But while people suffer, Sideshow is prattling on about cycleways, Gerry Brownlee waxes lyrically about over-sized convention centres and CERA boss Roger Sutton invites children to enter his 'Design A Playground' competition - when he isn't banning legitimate political protests.
And Canterbury Tourism are spending money on videos like this...